


Your eyes look like coming home.

by smallbump



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-01
Updated: 2014-12-01
Packaged: 2018-02-27 17:32:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2701385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smallbump/pseuds/smallbump
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Another week passes of Dan and Phil being utterly in love, they're ending it on top of a mountain, saying yes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Your eyes look like coming home.

**Monday morning.**

Their apartment is soundless and dark. Doors are closed, to the kitchen and bathroom and bedroom. It’s past ten but the blinds are still drawn down, nightlight’s still off and loud snoring is escaping each mouth.   
One arm thrown over another’s back, the other tucked under the pillow. Duvets are lying hazily over their pale, skinny bodies. It’s winter but it’s not cold in their apartment. Dan likes it warm and keeps the heating a little bit higher than needed. He’s lying with his face away from Phil, on his stomach with both his hands under the pillow. His elbow is dangerously close to Phil’s nose, though neither seems to be moving any time soon.

It’s a Monday morning and they’ve got nothing planned other than a radio show later in the evening. Their Mondays aren’t as awful as people with nine-to-five-jobs’ Mondays but Mondays are always Mondays and no matter what, they always seem to be a bit too much to handle.

Dan wakes up, turns his head over and squinting his eyes to see if Phil is up, when he notice that he isn’t, Dan hugs his pillow tight and closes his eyes shut and shuffling slightly to get comfortable again. He brings his arm in and pulls the duvet up over his shoulders. It’s probably too early anyway, he thinks and drifts off to sleep after a minute or two.

10:30 may seem late but to them, it’s just morning. Phil didn’t fall asleep until after 2am, so he needs all the hours of sleep his body lets him have. But eight hours of sleep is what one should sleep and he has now, so he wakes. Groaning into his pillow because he’s still tired and then he opens his eyes, and is met by a mop of curly, brown hair as usual. A moment later, when all his limbs and bones have woken up too, he notices his arm thrown over Dan’s back so he brings the other to him – tries to, when Dan’s asleep, he’s surprisingly strong.   
There’s a slight groan coming from Dan, who is half-awake and would rather be whole asleep instead.

“Dan?” Phil says, voice raspy and dream drenched. He leans on his elbow and over Dan to grab his phone from the nightstand. Dan sighs and mumbles something inaudible; Phil lies down close beside him and unlocks his phone. He’s not so tired anymore, not in a way that makes his eyelids heavy and his eyes unable to keep open.   
  
This is their morning routine after all, Phil checking his social media-sites, while waiting for Dan to wake up. It’s nice, a good start of the day. At least for Phil.   
Around 11pm, he’s done and puts away his phone to move his focus to Dan. They only got two hours before they need to be at work and he’s not sure they’ve got any breakfast food. Or lunch either for that matter.

“Dan, we need to get up.” He speaks slowly and quietly. It is still too early to be loud and energetic. Dan moves around, lying on his side and brings his hands under his left chin, “Five more minutes, okay babe?”

“It’s already eleven, and I don’t think we have anything to eat so-“

“Please?” He says, without opening his eyes, but smiles and Phil watches him as he’s tightly tucked in under the duvet with curly hair framing his sleeping face, before he leans forward and kisses the smiling lips. 

“Okay,”

Dan pouts his lips slightly, as if he’s about to kiss back but forms them into a smile instead and a tiny giggle escapes. Phil almost wonders if he’s dreaming. For the next five or ten minutes Phil is watching Dan sleep and admiring the beautiful structure of his face. Another morning routine that he doesn’t mind so much either.

It ended up being ten minutes after all.

 

 **Tuesday afternoon.**    
  
Outside the cold raindrops are pouring down so they might as well make a lazy day out of it. It’s Tuesday afternoon and they’re just being at home all day, doing nothing in particular. Those days are necessary too.

There’s unwashed dishes in the kitchen that someone is going to deal with sooner or later, but now they’re sitting in the sofa with a cup of coffee in hand and a laptop on each of their knee. Phil comments on pictures they scroll through on the tumblr dash and Dan laughs too loudly as usual, but it doesn’t feel natural. He is happy, yet so miserable. There’s a weight on his shoulders today that he simply cannot shake off, no matter how hard he tries and no matter how much Phil makes him laugh. After finishing his coffee and accidentally drinking the coffee grounds too so he makes a varied of grossed out facial expression, Dan slides down a little on the sofa, resting his head against Phil’s arm. Sometimes he wish he wasn’t so tall, because then he could curl up on the sofa with his legs tucked in comfortably, but now, with his 6ft 3, it’s not so comfortable and quite honestly impossible too for that matter. So his legs rest of the coffee table next to Phil’s. It’s not as comfy and cosy as he would like it to be, but it’ll do.  
Phil closes the laptop and puts it beside him, his coffee cup’s been empty for minutes.

“Something wrong?” He asks while shrinking his body further down in the sofa, and closer to Dan, their heads now resting against each other.

“It’s a good thing we’re not doing anything today, because it’s a hard day to be alive.” Dan says truthfully, feeling quite pathetic but he can’t help how his brain works sometimes. Phil has learned not to argue with these feelings, and simply accept them so he says nothing at all and instead, puts his hand on Dan’s knee and begins to stroke his thumb back and forth in a slow pace, before bringing it up and around Dan’s shoulders.    
  
“Let’s just stay like this for a while.”

With their heads leaning against one another, they stare out the window on the other side of the room and sit quietly together. Anything other than that isn’t needed right now. Dan is incredibly grateful for Phil and for his patience. Most people want know the problem, find a solution and fix it, which is why Dan has stopped talking to people when he’s feeling like this. However, with Phil he can be honest. He can be just as sad and miserable as he is, because Phil won’t make him feel bad about it.

He looks up to the older, blinking a few times out of tiredness, “I love you,” he says to get Phil’s attention. They’re catching eyes and Dan can feel himself metaphorically drowning in Phil’s eyes for the billionth time since he first saw them, and it still catches his breath a little. Unnoticeably, Phil moves closer and attach their lips together, Dan was too busy loving his eyes but quickly indulges in the kiss and breaths in the feeling completely, wishing they could stay like this for eternity.

“You too,” Phil whispers when they let go, smiling that sweet smile only Dan gets to see.

 

**Wednesday evening.**

Phil is in their office, with the computer as his only source of light as it’s shining bright against his face, he’s been in the same position for so long that the sun went down and the moon and stars came up outside of the window, and he didn’t really notice. Every now and then he makes a mental note to himself to check his email more often  - and actually reply to those he need to reply to. Because it’s been hours and he still haven’t even started to pay the bills yet and it’s already 8:15pm.

He can hear Dan shouting at the TV and talking to it, or to himself, and it makes him chuckle. If only he could be done with this so he could go join his nerdy boyfriend in the lounge and laugh at him there, snuggled up beside him on the sofa with nice lighting on and a cup of tea in hand instead of here, in a computer chair and a dark room.   
  
“Maybe a break…” But he doesn’t let himself finish the sentence, “No. Focus.” Phil runs a hand through his hair, groaning because it only made him realise he should probably shower. He takes off his glasses and rubs his eyes, lets his hands run over his face, before blinking a few times to get his focus back. While trying to finish reading the email, he clean his glasses with his t-shirt but it’s impossible, he’s half blind without glasses or contacts. 

“Okay, let’s do this.” He says to himself while placing the glasses back on his nose, not being any cleaner than before.

“Do what?” He hears someone ask behind him and laughter is following, “Who are you talking to, weirdo?”

Phil spins around to face Dan, “Shut up, I heard you talking to the TV.”

To which Dan turns bright red of embarrassment, fiddling with his hands awkwardly, but all Phil can think about is how cute he is and how much he wants to wrap him up in his arms, put him in his lap and cover his entire face with kisses and snuggles for the rest of the night and the rest of their lives.

“You do that sometimes,” Phil adds, not that it’s helping Dan to feel less embarrassed but Phil doesn’t care. They do enough stupid shit the other has caught them doing so this is just another thing to add to the list.

“Yeah, well, your singing in the shower isn’t so pretty.” Dan speaks in a defensive tone, looking down at his hands before bringing one up as he begins biting his nails.

Phil gets up from his chair and kisses his cheek, “Don’t do that, bear.” He says, holding his hand over Dan’s and taking it away from his mouth so he can kiss him there instead.

He moves beside Dan and down to the kitchen to make himself a cup of coffee. If he’s going to be paying bills as well, he’s going to need the caffeine. Though, Phil doesn’t get further than taking out a coffee cup from the cupboard before Dan steals his attention with kisses, pressing him against the counter, digging deep into Phil’s hips with his palms while kissing him fully on the mouth, tongue and everything.

The two of them kiss a lot.

Sex is happening every once in a while but kissing is every day, every hour. Either it’s little pecks on lips as they’re half-lying in the sofa, watching some TV or it’s rough, horny kisses in the shower after a long day of work and socializing. Or it’s slow, sleepy, sloppy kisses in the morning when they don’t really need to get up just yet but doesn’t feel like falling asleep again.

Or it’s this; needy kisses in the kitchen because neither is having a particularly good day, and life is tiresome but at least there’s kissing so let’s do that instead.   
Dan loves kissing, some days he takes every opportunity there is, some he makes them up.

Phil is more of a cuddling-person, but there’s lots of that too. After kissing comes cuddling or sex, but after sex there are always cuddles. He brings his arms up around Dan’s neck and crosses them, pulling the younger even closer. Legs are intertwining and chests touching and lips locking together, and everything feels so fucking good.

“I think I really needed that,” Dan mumbles as they let go, but keeping their foreheads touching and noses brushing lightly.

Phil kisses him quick once more before smiling, “You’re welcome. Do you need a cup of coffee too?”

“Sure, why not. It’s not like I’m going to bed anytime soon anyway,”

 

**Thursday night.**

After a long day of meetings and dinner with colleagues from the BBC, Dan collapses onto the sofa with a heavy sigh, yawning and stretching his arms. He could probably fall asleep right there and then, and wouldn’t really mind at all. He wouldn’t mind if he slept through the rest of the week, quite frankly. Phil sits down beside him with a beer in hand, even if he’s already had two at dinner. But it’s just one of those nights, Dan thinks.

“Why does beer smell so delicious sometimes?”

“D’you want one?” Phil asks instead of answering, probably because he’s too tired to think of a good or witty reply. Dan nods from where he’s lying, legs thrown over Phil’s thighs after he sat down, one arm behind his head. “They’re in the fridge,” Phil says, taking a sip from the bottle, smiling into it when he hears Dan groan from the other end of the sofa, kicking his feet a little at Phil’s arm.

“Please get me one, I can’t move.”

Phil could start bickering but fortunately for Dan, he hates it because Dan always wins because Dan know how to talk his way out of things, so it’s easier to simply go get a beer for Dan, or whatever it is he’s asking for at the time. Something that Dan takes advantage of maybe a little too often, though he likes to think he makes up for it in kisses and cuddles.

“Thanks,” he says tiredly, sitting up a little so it’s easier to drink. He hold his legs up, Phil sits down and he puts them back on Phil’s thighs, making himself comfortable again before taking a sip of the beer.   
There’s not much talk floating between them, a small comment here and there. Sometimes even Dan gets tired of talking a lot and definitely gets tired of hearing his own voice.

After a while, they let the silence speak instead, the distant police sirens from outside breaks through occasionally from time to time, Dan listens as they get closer only to get further away just as fast and he wonders what kind of crime some idiot has done now.   
Dan puts down the empty on the floor, curling up the best he can and feel Phil’s hand soothingly stroke his legs, something that could probably lull him to sleep any minute if he wanted to. Though, waking up on the sofa after a few hours is a mistake he doesn’t like to repeat, even if it does happen a little too often.

“Do you think we spend too much time together?”

It’s such an unexpected question that Dan isn’t sure he even heard it right, “What d’ya mean?” he asks, eyebrows and nose frowning slightly, and he would be lying if he said he didn’t begin to worry. Phil is not one for the deep questions.

“No, was just thinking, I’ve been next to you throughout the entire day, like, we’re always together. What if it becomes too much?”

“Do you, is it bothering you?” Dan looks at Phil from where he’s half-lying, trying to read his mind off his face but it’s blank and quiet.   
Dan hasn’t thought about it that much, maybe one time or two, but it’s been when he’s been annoyed with Phil, or when he’s wanted to be alone. Which he then is allowed to be, and then it is fine. Maybe he is so used to Phil’s company that it’s weirder without it. Because, truth be told, the days they spend apart are some of the worst.

“No, not at all. I was thinking on the meeting earlier, how glad I am to have you with me, I would’ve been so nervous otherwise.” Phil confesses, looking at Dan with a small smile showing. It makes Dan smile too, he chuckles lightly.

“Then why are you asking? I don’t mind spending all my time with you at all.” 

Phil puts down his beer bottle on the floor too, pushing Dan’s legs off him and leans down to lie beside him on the sofa, uncomfortably but neither cares. “I just wanted to make sure.” He says and kisses Dan, one hand on his chest that moves up to his face and he cups Dan’s cheek in his hand.

“Don’t scare me like that, Phil.” Dan says, a hint of nervousness slipping through his words. “You know I’m overly insecure and has low self-esteem and is a wreck as a person in general.”

Phil laughs at him, tongue showing and the skin around his eyes crinkle beautifully. They kiss again; Dan leans forward and places one hand on the back of Phil’s head, fingers tangling into his hair that’s drenched in wax and hairspray. Dan prefers it in the morning when it’s soft and slightly curly and messy.

“But I also know I love you,”

 

**Friday night.**

They have friends over, just a couple for pre-drinks before going to an event they’re on the list on, because that’s the only kind of parties they go to nowadays. It’s surreal, yet the most natural thing ever. This is their life now. Always on a list, always someone who gets VIP-passes, sneaking out the back doors and so on. Dan never intended to be a famous person, he never wanted to.

It just happened.

The same way him and Phil just happened, and a day later (or so it felt at least) they were in love and would be for the rest of time. Simple as that.  
There had been periods of time where it was hard, it can’t always be easy and happy and great. But most of the time. Which it is. And now, now Dan is so happy he might internally combust if he got any happier. 

He moves from the kitchen, two drinks in hand, excusing his way over to the dinner table and to his seat next to Phil, who owns one of the drinks. Before sitting down, he kisses Phil quick and they both smile with crinkly skin on the top of their noses, squinting eyes briefly. When Dan looks around, he meets Louise with his eyes and she rolls hers, but laughs the second after.   
Most of their friends mock them about how in love they are, and for all the right reasons. Dan would probably be sick to his stomach seeing two people be as in love as him and Phil are, and he sometimes tries to tone it down but it’s hard. 

Phil sits beside him, in a nice darker mint-green shirt with a black little bowtie, fringe perfected for twenty long minutes a few hours before and eyes shining bright in his bluish/greenish colour. He’s smiling from ear to ear, listening interestingly to Jack’s anecdotes, and dropping a funny comment when the timing is right and laughing sweetly when needed.   
Phil is beautiful. He is beautiful no matter the time of the day, if it’s after coming home from being outside all day and his hair is a mess and eyes are tired and that smile is hard to unfold. Or if it’s in the morning, when he’s slept for hours, tossing and turning in bed so the hair strains are all in the wrong places and they’ve gone a bit curly at the edges.

But maybe he is most beautiful like this, after all. Clean shaved, fresh from the shower with his hair fixed and nice clothes on. One hand tapping the glass of his drink, the other lying on Dan’s thigh with Dan’s hand on top.  
They’re ridiculous like that, always needing to touch in some way. Either it’s feet and legs tied together under the table or it’s hands on thighs or arms thrown over shoulders. They’re sitting close too. Their arms brush against one another whenever either of them moves the slightest. 

That’s how they want it to be, how they’re used to it being.

An hour or two passes by before they call the taxis. They arrive quickly at whatever place it is this time, it’s not important. Neither is the actual event. Dan doesn’t bother remembering things like that, tonight he wants to have fun with his friends and that’s it.

They greet a few people here and there as they’re walking around, making small talk to people they’ve seen a few times. Some from work are here, other youtubers, and people, lots and lots of people.   
Another drink goes down, two or three shots as well and Dan can feel himself loosen up, dropping the anxious part of him quickly and instead focusing on being carefree and happy. Like he is at home.

“Let’s dance, babe,” he shouts against Phil’s ear, drunk on tequila and love and life. They’re not the best dancers, but they make it work.

 

**Saturday midmorning.**

After coming home, drunk and giggling around 4am, not sleeping until 6am because both of them thought making out and giving each other sloppy blowjobs was more important at the time, they decided to have the longest lie-in possible. The hours do pass; Phil wakes up around two in the afternoon, stretching his limbs and bones, pulling the duvet closer to him quickly again and snuggling up behind Dan whose facing away from him, snoring quietly as he’s lying on his side with his hands tucked under the pillow. Sunlight is slipping through the curtains they barely pulled down in the morning before dozing off to sleep.   
Phil brushes his fingertips along Dan’s back, feeling the goose bumps appearing moments later. His skin is warm and soft, birthmarks and petite liver spots like the tiniest mountains on his back, Phil loves them. He loves to stroke his palm over Dan’s back, feeling them against his skin as he presses down barely noticeably.   
He can’t resist but is gentle, not to wake Dan.

It goes a few minutes before he can hear Dan smacking his lips to get rid of the dryness in his mouth; Phil takes this as an opportunity to greet him with little pecks of kisses in his neck, whispering good morning while moving his arm around Dan’s waist and dragging him to turn around and face him, Dan lets his body follow.

“Morning,” he mumbles with a hoarse voice, drenched in sleep and last night’s alcohol. “Time is it?”

“I don’t know,” Phil replies, watching Dan blink slowly with heavy eyelids a few times before he puts on a smile. It doesn’t matter what time it is, they have nothing planned for the day and won’t make any plans either. “I’ll start breakfast, come when you’re ready,”

“Okay,”

Before walking out of the bedroom, he puts on a pair of pyjama pants and a t-shirt that is thrown beside them. He ruffles his hair to get rid of the bed hair while making his way to the kitchen where he opens the fridge to see if they have enough milk and eggs for pancakes, which they do, so he puts together the pancake batter and gets going. Dan arrives when he’s got a few already done, they share a few kisses before Dan pulls out plates and glasses from the cupboard.

“Orange juice?” Dan asks, standing with the fridge door open, jam and nutella in one arm and a juice carton in the other hand, looking at Phil with question marks in his eyes. They never have juice ever.

“I got cravings for it?” Phil hesitates. He’d seen a woman in front of him at the store buying juice and he had just grabbed one too. It was still unopened even days later.  
Dan can’t help but let out a light laugh, “Buy juice if you want to, I don’t care,” he says fondly, putting it all down on the kitchen table.   
They eat the pancakes together once Phil has made them all, talking about yesterday and Dan reads out news stories from his phone.   
When Phil’s done, he rests his chin in his hand with the elbow on the wooden table, he watches Dan read from his phone, listening with half an ear. Mostly he’s thinking about the future.

He thinks about years ahead, when there’s rings on their fingers and a little girl or boy running around after shovelling pancakes in their tiny mouths and Dan would laugh at them falling over but help them up just as quickly, kissing the part of their body that hurts.

The kitchen would be childproof, something that would probably make it harder for Phil to open the cupboards and oven too, if he knows himself right. And they’ll both step on toys lying around the apartment and curse with their teeth gritted while their little child laughs from across the room.

Maybe they’ll move to a house, with a backyard and a porch. They’ll have swings and a sandbox and more toys they still wouldn’t pick up from the ground no matter how many times they’ll step on it and curse.

“Can you imagine a little kid running around here?”

It’s the type of question that makes Dan spit out his orange juice, nearly chocking on what’s left and he begins coughing.

“A kid?!” he spits out once he’s done coughing but not calming down.

“Well, not like right now, or tomorrow. But in a few years? You want kids, right?”

Dan wipes his mouth and swallows once again, putting down his phone to focus on Phil fully. “Of course. One day, I definitely want kids. I want two or three maybe, we’ll see. Maybe we only can handle one.”

“Imagine twins,” Phil says with a dreamy voice. He’s always liked twins, wishes he were one in fact. Dan nods at him and they get big smiles plastered on their faces.

 

**Sunday.**

On Sunday morning, Phil has one of his many crazy ideas when he wants them to go for a walk in the woods.

“I’ve read about this really nice place just forty minutes outside of London and the view is magical. We should go see it!” It takes some convincing, with Dan being the least outdoors-person ever, but he agrees to come after a while. They get ready, and call a taxi. An hour later the walk begins, quickly turning more into a hike as they’re heading up a smaller mountain, or a bigger hill. Dan isn’t sure what the correct word for it is. They’re going upwards and it’s exhausting is all he knows. The fog is beginning to lie thick just above them; the air is humid and warm. His quickly straightened hair is beginning to curl, his fringe unpleasantly sticking to his forehead.

“Why’d had to come up with this madness?” he asks Phil, half-jokingly. It is kind of nice, actually, but also exhausting.

“It’s nice being outdoors though,” Phil smiles, stretching out his arm for Dan to take his hand. “C’mon, we’re almost at the top!”

Dan willingly takes his hand, but less willingly keeps on walking. The fog is growing thicker and they can’t see much in front of them, or behind them either for that matter.

“We’re doomed,” he announces with a strong voice, but gets ignored. 

“We shouldn’t have gone alone,” he says a few minutes later, now actually starting to wonder how the hell they’re going to get to the right place – and then back down again.

“I don’t want to die here, Phil.”

Phil laughs at him loudly, looking back and smiling, “We’re not going to die here, Dan. We’re almost there and then we just have to go the same way down.”

Dan sighs loudly and annoyingly, groaning as he’s sort of being dragged by Phil. His feet and legs have given up a while ago. However, they finally make it to the top. And the view is probably magical as Phil said, if it isn’t for the thick fog lying around them, making it impossible to see two feet in front of them.  
Dan comments about it, again and again but Phil seems to brush it off. They find an old bench to sit down on; Dan empties the water bottle quickly.

“I- I want to tell you something,” Phil begins and Dan nods to let him know he’s listening. “You know I love you, right? Yeah, but-“

“But? Phil, what? What’s wrong?”

Phil just chuckles, “No, Dan, I didn’t mean that kind of but. Forget the but. I love you. I love being with you, waking up next to you and falling asleep with your arms around me. I adore your laugh and your, slightly weird and sometimes offensive, humour and you make me happier than anyone else ever could and-“

Phil swallows, meeting Dan’s eyes fully who is sat speechless because he knows what’s coming although he isn’t prepared. “Yes?”

“I don’t mind your bad days, I don’t care if you sometimes doze off into an existential crisis and not talk to me for a day.”

Dan bits his lip guiltily, but stays quiet.

“I love it when you’re drunk and can’t even remember our home address but you always remember my name, and I love hearing you sigh it out loud while your nails are digging deep into my skin. I love all of you, all your flaws and imperfections, as much as I love your great qualities too, like the fact that you’re super intelligent, and talented and caring and sweet.”

He takes one final deep breath, smiling before his mouth open and Dan doesn’t know if he can hold back his tears any longer.

“Daniel, will you marry me?” Phil’s voice breaks the tiniest at the end of the sentence and he looks embarrassed and nervous but mostly beautiful.

“I’d love to marry you, Philip.” Dan replies proudly, squinting his eyes and frowning his nose while the smile on his face is bigger than ever before. He cups Phil’s face in his cold hands, leaning in so close their noses are touching, saying he loves him too before pressing his cold, dry lips against Phil’s and it’s a kiss he won’t ever forget. It’s a moment and a day he won’t ever forget for the rest of his life.  
Dan’s heart is beating fast and his mouth feels dry too, when he tries to confess his love back to Phil the words stumble upon each other and it all comes out like a mess, mixed with the tears that’s rolling down his cheeks so Phil giggles and kisses him instead, saying it’s okay because he knows Dan loves him.

They walk down the hill, hand in hand and smiling happily. Dan doesn’t complain once that it takes them twice as long to get back as it did to get up, not when it’s mostly because he stops them so he can kiss Phil once more.

When they get home, Dan locks himself into the bedroom and calls his mother, who cries hysterically at the other end of the phone and Dan thinks this is it; he’s going to internally combust out of happiness now. 


End file.
